Dear E. This past week Daddy and I have talked about how grateful we are to still have you in our lives. Last week was a scary one for us in the least. You were supposed to be taken away from us to go live with your Grandpa in Mesa. The call that we got was completely unexpected. I do not have the words to express to you just how happy we were when CPS told us you would be staying with us longer. Daddy and I hugged, cried and thanked God for such a wonderful blessing. God had heard our prayers and He answered...like I knew He would....like He does every single time. If you ever get the chance to read this, I want you to know that every day spent with you makes me so happy. Each day with you is such a gift. These moments with you are greater than any treasure on earth. I cherish each moment that I have with you like it might be the last....because one day it might just be the last. I feel like the luckiest Mama in the world to have you as apart of our family right now. Every night when I hold you, as you kiss my cheek a gazillon times and say "Mama..I love you THIS much!" with your hands outstretched makes me melt all over. I wish I could freeze these moments in time and hold onto you forever and never let you go. I thank God for you everyday. I thank Him that He placed such a special little girl in our lives..a little girl who is so full of life and full of love. I couldn't have asked for more. I wish you knew the amount of joy and happiness that you have brought.
I want you to know that your Heavenly Father loves you with an infinite amount of love, a love so pure, so holy, and so indescribable. Never question His love for you. His love is always there. The love that He has for specifically you will never waiver. His love for you will never dim. He is there. He is always there whenever you need Him, even at times when you don't feel like He is. He is there fully and completely. Talk to him, confide in him, and I promise you that you will feel of His love and grace in your life. God has created you to be you and only you. You are special. You are a wonderful daughter of God (a Queen) and He is your King! Never forget that you came to earth as a child of a divine Father, with something of divinity in your very makeup. The Lord didn't send you here to fall or fail. He did not give you this life to waste it. He bestowed upon you the gift of mortality that you might gain experience-positive, wonderful, purposeful experience-that will eventually lead you to life eternal.
I want you to know that life can sometimes be hard...sometimes really hard, but its so beautiful in so many ways. Trust Him with all your heart and allow Him to show you just how great He is. You alone are enough. Never forget that. Don't ever forget who's hands you are in. His ways and His will is always better than our own, even when sometimes we may think that we have all the answers. We don't. He does. Seek for Him. Seek for His will daily in your life and I promise you that you will be guided by the spirit to do the things that He would have you do and that you will be blessed. Embrace all the many opportunities that come your way, especially the ones that you didn't initially in-vision for yourself.
I want you to know just how much I love you baby girl. I will always love you no matter what happens. You are one of things that has given me life. You have taught me so much. You have made me feel a kind of love that I have never felt before. You make me want to be better. You make me want to be brave. You make me want to soar above and beyond what may seem impossible. I love you my little monkey!